Social Duty on Demand

Have you ever realized that in our social life, the wider networks we have, the more demands are on us?

Now, some of you might ask "What kind of demand?" or "Nah, why would you call that a demand?"

When we have a certain relationship, with a friend for example, especially if you're close friends, it means more demand for you, and vice versa. Still don't get it? Let me give another examples.

Parents, what are their demand on you? As a child, you might have to live up to their expectation, like getting A in every subject (now that sounds really Asian, but nevermind), use some of your spare time with your family, attend parties or family gatherings with your big whole family in which you don't know most of the people, and etc.

Friends, or close friends, what are their demand on you? Maybe they expect you to hang out with them much, either going to the mall, movies, cafe, or just gathering in one room to chat and nom snacks. 

And if you have a boyfriend/ girlfriend. It means you have to manage your time, so that you can have time to be together with him/her too, right? 

Plus there are other things like college, student organization you join, high school friends, and other circles that you have, which also put demands on you.

And vice versa, we have certain demands on them too. Because humans need each other, as simple as that. But I'm not going to educate you about basic human needs. I'm just going to focus on this word : "demand".

So, what's the big deal?

Well it is a big deal, for most of the people. What happens often is that when those demands "collide"  and you have to set your priority. Which demand do you want to fulfill? But no, when I say demand, I don't address it as "pressure" or anything (in case you think that way), but yes, it can turn into a pressure in your life if you can't handle it and it stress you out.

When you have to fulfill your "demand", it's your your social duty. It's not something which is written by law, but it would be a shame if you don't do it. It's like taking groceries from a store without paying (i know my metaphor sucks, but anyway), or being a fake friend who's only there when you need people, but not there when they need you.

"Yes, I will fulfill all of my social demands!" Whoa hold it right there. Here's the ugly truth.

You can't fulfill all of social demands on you.

Sometimes, like I said before, we have to set our priorities. Or if you reaaaaally want to fulfill all of those, then it means you have to be very good at managing your time.

Once you have set your priorities, take the consequences and the fact that you will have to sacrifice the other demands to fulfill this top priority demand that you have chosen, put them aside, and either dump them, or fulfill them later.

 But all of them are important for me! 


Well if you think that way, then try it to better your time management skills, your negotiation skills, and make your way to healthy relationships with your friends and family.

Last but not least, never look at the "social demands" in negative way. Because if you do, you'll feel a lot worse about yourself or others (or both sides) and you won't be able to solve it.

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Cheers.